Drop the "Poly" out of "amory"...

Catchy title isn't it? I thought so, but you might not think so when I am done.

It's been about 2 years that I became aware to this way of loving more... Only about a year that I've been comfortable with such a label. So as far as all that is Polyamory I am by far no expert in the matter. I will not cite you statistics and what not, simply my thoughts, feelings and experiences thus far.

Over the last year I have met 35+ men that claim to live and be in a polyamorous relationship with their wife/girlfriend/significant other. Out of those 35 men I have witnessed less than a handfull actually live it and practice it's definition. The other 95% are far from what Polyamory is supposed to be or stand for.

I've heard this called poly fuckery or poly sluttery, cheating, non-monogamy, and open-marriage/relationship. I wish I could ask all of those that would hide behind the Polyamory label as why they feel the need to misrepresent what they are looking for. Far be it for this slut to turn away a great roll in the hay... but then again that's just how I roll. I don't need to love every fella I've fucked or blown, I love a good old fashioned orgasm just as much if not more than the next person.

I just choose to have more, I choose to want more, I choose to love more. It's why I chose to try on this label of Polyamorous in the first place. It seemed to fit. I suppose I am greedy, wanting the sex and the love, but hey I can dream can't I?

After a year, all the fucking and sucking, I still can only count 0 active polyamorous relationships under my belt. Perhaps this would discredit my whole view, as I stated above this is based on my experiences thus far. For me it is a lifestyle choice, it is a love-style, it is not the equivalent to my sexual orientation, which in and of itself can be as open as my heart and mind.

I can say that being with a married man is a hell of a lot easier than being with a single man. At least with a married man, I can enjoy the fun parts & sex, and not have the drama. I currently enjoy this now with my soldier friend, for the last 3 years, we have enjoyed each others friendship, as well as each others sex. It is far from a romantic love interest. I dare say he is like fucking my best friend.

In contrast, some of the single men I have dealt with, they have wanted to own some piece of me or all of me. As if they were scaling a mountain and wanting to plant a flag in my arse as a sign of ownership. Then when I object to the limited exclusivity, they say I cannot commit to a real relationship. WTF is up with that bullshit? Must I be owned in order to receive love and intimacy in a relationship?

Most monogamous men I have met cannot commit to a relationship. What is so threatening about Polyamory & Loving more than one person?

I tell you with some of my friendships I have more commitment and depth within them than any romantic relationship I've ever had. These friendships are more polyamorous than my sexual encounters with various self identifying Polyamorous men. The friendships I wouldn't change ever, but my sexual encounters need to if I am to ever be happy and fulfilled.

I can also tell you that since I have been exploring Polyamory, I have had more one night stands under the guise of this label. (Yes I am that gullible at times. I want to believe the best of everyone, even the bad ones who would hide behind the label.) It is almost as if I am a sampler platter, knock off a little piece to see if you like the flavor. I have come to the conclusion that if I keep this up, there may be nothing left of me one day because I am all sampled out. Which is why I will conclude with this for now....

I am dropping the poly for now and going in for the amory -
by this I mean while I will remain non-monogamous I will continue to love more. Honestly for me it is about the love, and the potential for love to be multiplied on so many levels that has put me to where I am today.